Stressed at work? No patience to handle tantrums of children? How often do you lose control of yourself and get angry? Does it result in scolding and beating child? If yes, then you are heading towards more problems. By seeing you losing control, your child is going to behave the same way. Children are our best observers and followers too. They learn maximum from us during early age. So what’s the solution for this?
Scolding and physical punishment causes long term effects on children’s mind. First thing, we are making child do something forcefully, and throwing negative feeling on him/her. Children keep this scolding and physical punishment with them longer than we expect. These things keep on accumulating if we keep repeating those. After some time, you must have noticed children hiding things because of such a punishment fear. Also they feel afraid of their own parents also. Which is really not good. We want to avoid all this, and also want child to feel that he and she is doing something wrong in a simpler way.
Parents also don’t feel good after punishing in such a way. Parents don’t feel proud of such acts they perform with children. Even I have seen parents bursting into tears after physically punishing children. It makes us feel that we are not good parents, though we are doing it for the betterment of child. In short, parents are also not happy after such acts. We need better alternative for parents also.
Introduce a concept of naughty corner also called as time out for your child. Naughty corner will not be an isolated place. It is just a separate place. May not be in front of Television. Child can see everything happening, and you can also see what child is doing. If child is behaving in wrong way, just let him/her sit in that corner for just 2 or 3 minutes. Don’t extend it too long. You also don’t need to shout on child to sit in that corner. Just changing tone of your voice is enough. No one talks to the child during that period. Child just sits idle during that time. After it’s over, quietly explain the reason and continue with normal activities. This can work for children up to children of few years old.
During initial times, child will have fun during naughty corner sittings. But as time passes, there will be sense of punishment. He/she will be serious while being in naughty corner. It should not be the case that every now and then we are sending child in naughty corner, this will reduce seriousness of it.
In short, we just make child feel that, there is something unacceptable done, and we don’t want it to be repeated. Hence this is a small action to create that seriousness. We are doing it though we love our kids a lot.