As a parent will you accept if someone says you are over protecting kids? May be not. Instead you will say, “Should I not even protect my children? Why do you call it over protecting?” This is a genuine argument. Each parent may end up doing this argument with others for a simple reason – the thin line between protecting and over protecting. The line which can easily go blur with our increasing love towards our children. But for the benefit of our own children, we have to some day accept that over protecting kid is not good for child’s development.
What is Over Protecting Kids?
Honestly! There will be hardly anybody who can say that I have definition of over protecting. As said earlier, the line between protecting and over protecting is very blur. But we will try to differentiate protection and over protection based on some common sense. If you have any good way of drawing this line, please share me through comments. Take an example, your kid is trying to do something, there is a possibility of some injury to the kid, you sense it and take the control and do it yourself for kid. Take another example, you are with your kid in garden, there is a play/instrument that lets kids climb on a wall or net, your kid starts climbing, you sense the risk, you lift the kid and put at the top of wall/net directly. One more example, child has recently learned cycling, wants to take a ride to the road corner during less or no traffic period by taking footpath route, you deny permission. In all these three scenarios, here are alternatives to your actions- first case you keep an eye on child by warning the kid about possibility of injury, second case you just stand behind the kid to catch if kid falls, third case you allow the kid if you are allowed to accompany on another bicycle. There can be more alternatives but just think over the earlier actions. Can we term those as over protecting actions? Definitely you love them that is why you end up taking such actions, but are those actions not discouraging children from doing bit challenging things on own? All such acts where you could have let the children with some care to do something, but you did not allow child to do or you yourself did the thing, can be called as over protecting. This can be a crude way of judging on own if you are protecting or over protecting.
What is Impact of Over Protecting on Kids?
Here is the list –
Children lose self confidence
- Children learn things late
- They may create opinion about over protecting parents
- Hiding things from parents
- Less of initiative from children
- Less risk taking ability
- Failure to do things which other same age children can do easily
There can be many more. But these are just few indicative impacts.
How to Avoid Over Protecting Kids?
Simple, just protect. If you identify a risk in the things kids are going to do, counter it using appropriate method so that the child does the thing and risk is also mitigated. Instead of not allowing kid to do that thing, put a protecting layer around kid so that if there is any unwanted circumstance, the kid escapes without any harm. You can take a look at the examples given above for guidance.
There can be situations every minute when you want to protect children, take a call by considering this judgemental thin line between protecting and over protecting.